Monday, September 29, 2008
And the rain clouds and cold weather roll in
After a little over a month in this fine nation of Korea, i am shocked to find i am already feeling a little culture shock and rather home sick. I must admit things are not quite what i thought they would be like. Well i guess i had no idea what things would be like and find myself comparing life here to europe and africa. Not that i never got homesick there, but for whatever reason i am seeing it or choosing to see it as different this time. I have been trying to let go and not let my ego have such control over me, but i find my fears mounting and crumble at there feet.
I guess my main things aremy usual things in life, that i am still not fully able to let go over or control? Korea being such a homogenous and reserved country it is easier for my fears of my own inadequecies to mount, as i am daily stared at by people but never spoken to. I have never experienced such a thing on my travels and i am not used to it. Granted many a person would be thankful to not have a milion randoms talking to them everyday, but i personally like it.
Also the language has been a real barrier. Unlike in tanzania i did not get training in the language and now find little time to work on it. Which makes things much harder, especially whenyou are really hungry and the woman in the restaurant can not understand you when you ask for duk bokk gi. But as there is only one way to correct this i have begun working on my korean when i have spare time at school and i can already see a difference. Today in class i could pick up a few of the things the students or teacher were talking about.
Thank god for my students though, no matter how depressed i feel at night and choose to stay in all by myself. I am always happy after a class with them (well most of them). They are so cute and so full of energy. I especially like the ones at my rural school. There are fewer of them and therefore they seem to be more comfortable with me. One of them is sitting next to me right now, attempting to read this as i type.
Well i know it will pass but i felt it is something i must speak of to truly tell my tale.